What patterns are you living out that were never truly yours to begin with? Are you choosing your life, or repeating what you were taught to survive? What would change for the better if you decided the cycle stops with you?
In this podcast episode, Jennifer Froemel discusses breaking cycles and how to heal the patterns you inherited.
In This Podcast:
- Patterns are more than behaviors; they’re emotional blueprints
- What does it really mean to break a cycle?
- The first steps to change
- Reflection questions to ask yourself
Patterns are more than behaviors; they’re emotional blueprints
The patterns aren’t just behaviors [because] a lot of times they can also be emotional blueprints … the trans-generational trauma stuff. What we have learned scientifically is that your imprint is coming from your mother’s mother’s mother, and where does that come from?
Jennifer Froemel
Genetically, women are connected intergenerationally. While a grandmother was pregnant with her daughter, that daughter was growing her eggs, and one of those eggs became you today.
At one point, three generations were connected altogether. In this way, emotional and behavioral blueprints also get passed down.
What does it really mean to break a cycle?
Here’s the thing: breaking a cycle doesn’t mean condemning your family. It doesn’t mean blaming your parents, and it doesn’t mean rejecting your past. It just simply means, “Stop repeating patterns that were born out of survival.”
Jennifer Froemel
When you grow up in dysregulated environments, people so easily and often create behavioral or emotional patterns that are meant to help them survive in that environment.
They may not have been the healthiest, or the most productive, or even the safest in the long run, but they existed to keep you safe in that time.
Now that you are outside of that environment, you need to bring your inner world up into alignment with reality, and know that these patterns are no longer needed and may actually be hindering your life today.
When we’re breaking a cycle, we’re ultimately choosing because we’re aware. We’re choosing to use our awareness instead of just going on autopilot
Jennifer Froemel
The first steps to change
- 1 – Use your awareness
- 2 – Recognize the cost involved in continuing to use this pattern
- 3 – You start to see it in your lineage
- 4 – Permit yourself to choose your own story
- 5 – Start making small, consistent changes
I want you to take a deep breath and internally say, “The line stops here. I release what I inherited that doesn’t belong with my future. I honor them by healing myself.”
Jennifer Froemel
Reflection questions to ask yourself
Here are some journaling prompts to help you through this process:
- Which inherited pattern am I ready to release?
- Who will I become when that pattern no longer runs my life?
Remember, you didn’t choose these patterns, but you do choose what is next!
RESOURCES MENTIONED AND USEFUL LINKS
Donate to Jennifer Froemel’s Lifesaving Work in Nepal
Practice of the Practice Network
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CONNECT WITH ME
Visit The Innovative Counselling Partners Practice Website and connect on Facebook.
ABOUT THE FEAR OF CHANGE PODCAST
Change can be scary, but it doesn’t have to be. The Fear of Change podcast is all about helping you embrace change and live a more fulfilling life. Hosted by Jennifer Froemel, LCPC, a therapist with nearly 30 years of experience, we cover topics like mental wellness, holistic health, and improving relationships.
Jennifer’s down-to-earth approach makes it easy to understand why we fear change and how to move past those fears. Whether you’re dealing with anxiety, relationship issues, or just feeling stuck, there’s something here for you.
